k i really shouldnt be typing for my blog now..jus need a form of escape or smth...realised theres a lot i dont understand abt all subjs..especially econs! sigh..i really hate the lecture system la, it sucks lor..been getting back my results real slowly..not that i mind..dont want any of it la..my results are terrible la i really need to start studying and stuff..havent been feeling all that happy recently partly cuz of my marks, well not really..jus what my mum would think when i show them to her...its a real let down la..really dont like making her disappointed, i dont really care what i get but its what she would feel when she sees it..
whatever it is..its not jus the results..its everything that ive been realising recently jus really painful la, or maybe its really pmsing but a really different kind of pmsing..doesnt feel like it is i dunno...theres a lot of things i keep bottled up inside...someone once told me i shldnt keep it all inside that i shld open up and let loose..i dunno.. not my style...why be so sad or angry all the time? i guess i jus keep it to myself and hope that i will forget it and i really do..a lot of sad and hurtful things in the past i make myself forget and it really does go away after a while..aiya feel like a failure now..even how im complaining to a blog is pathetic la...i guess anyone who reads this now will get a shock at what im writing..dont worry yea i'll be fine..soon... i really admire clarence and how he can always be so happy and jovial, and always sooo helpful to pple..wah he was talking to me and helping me and he missed his show.. ahhh,..yep he really goes all out to help pple and its really nice of him..he may not even realised that he helped and thats what jus so wonderful abt him..
i wonder if its freaky to some of u who read this..cuz it doesnt really sound like me in real life right? kind of like a split personality thing.. hmm wonder if its psychological..
oh yea i realise i keep drawing a lot! during lectures..esp econs..its getting a lot worse..esp today..this is not good..and now wuyuan is starting to draw also!! oh no...
whatever la i feel so crap abt everything..oh yea and im getting fatter recently..gained abt 2kg..growing fatter..getting closer to the 60kg mark..if i keep putting on la..oh oh do i hav an eating problem as well? well..datelines coming for gp and pw..die, more stress...wonder if stress is causing this...if it is, its really diff from what i usually get..i dont go all bonkers and self blaming like tt,..aiya time to sleep. night..